So, the holidays are approaching fast. There are presents to buy, friends and relatives to see, get-togethers to plan or attend, and meals to prepare or share. No wonder many of us greet this season with a mixture of excitement and panic – it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. And for anyone living with the overpowering fatigue of MS, just the thought of all this activity can be exhausting.
The shopping can be a major chore... the office celebrations start too late in the day…having people over is too stressful to even think about... people’s houses aren’t accessible…friends and family don’t really get it – they’re either trying too hard to be helpful and sympathetic (you know – those sad, worried looks that say “Oh, I’m sooo sorry”), or don’t understand the impact of MS at all (“But you look so good!”). All of these challenges can lead to feelings of loss, and a major disconnect between the way things are, the way people think they’re supposed to be at holiday time, and the way they used to be before MS came along.
Grieving over changes and losses is a process that ebbs and flows with the ups and downs of the disease. Like all grief, it can feel very painful at times, but it generally lessens with time. And believe it or not, the grieving process is what allows people to gradually let go of the way things were yesterday and begin to think creatively about how they can make them better today.
If you find that your mood has tanked, leaving you feeling sad or irritable most of every day for a few weeks, accompanied by a loss of interest in things that used to engage you, changes in your sleep patterns and/or eating habits, or thoughts about hurting yourself or suicide, let your healthcare provider know about it. Depression is very treatable. Getting a grip on your mood will make life – and the holidays – feel much easier to manage.
So if the holiday blues are grabbing you more than the holiday spirit, don’t hesitate to get the help you need – from family, friends, or a qualified mental health professional. And if you’ve found some good strategies to manage – and enjoy – the holidays, please share them!